Some Thoughts On Super Mario Bros.

Recently I wa playing Mario, I was playing as Luigi because I always do since for reasons I’ve thought about far too much he seems like the more badass of the two, and something crossed my mind. It is never mad explicitly clear in the games why Mario is saving Princess Peach but I think we can all assume it’s because he loves her and most likely she loves him as well, so of course he’s going to save her. But then I realised I was playing as Luigi. Does he love her as well? Does this cause conflict in their relationship, I find it amazing that the two have been able to work together as plumbers all these years without some sort of fist fight occurring.


So Damn Badass



But then I realised that Peach is actually the villain in all of this. What a fucking prick tease, allowing both of these brothers to come to her aid, and then give them the sweet embrace they get when they’ve finally saved her from Bowsers castles. How dare she. They’re brothers, and she’s whoring herself off to both of them! Then to make matters worse, she’s doing the same with Bowser. I mean it doesn’t make sense that he comes and kidnaps her again and again unless he’s getting some on the side as well.








 
 SLUT!!!

 I’ve also theorised that maybe there’s more to this than meets the eye. It’s possible that Bowser loves Peach unconditionally and she stays true to Mario while she’s in captive. But then that leaves the question of why Luigi is leaving scrubbing shit stained toilets to come to her aid? It is possible that Luigi has some sort of weird incestuous crush on Mario and he’s trying to impress Mario by emulating him?

It’s a sad state of affairs and maybe we should just leave those guys to it, it’s really not our business to pry I guess.


 
Poor Mario

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